You had better look like your profile photo... or you're buying me drinks until you do!
I admit, I’m
really a worst person to date; I’m
really bad at opening conversation since I’m so very mahiyain and di rin ako
pala-salita, as in isang tanong – isang sagot lang! Madaldal alang ako when I’m
sober na! Ha-ha. I have couple of dates
na rin and I went out on a blind date once and the date ended in a police
station (next time nalang yung story) – it was funny though.
So, a first
date can be a nerve wracking experience and there is nothing worse than running
out of things to talk about.
Avoid these dating questions:
The FORD method is bound to spark a
conversation about something they are passionate about:
- Family
- Occupation
- Recreation
- Dreams
Do not
confuse this with RAPE:
- Religion
- Abortion
- Politics
- Economics
Also, avoid
the MOIST method:
- Masturbation
- Ovarian Cancer
- iTunes updates
- Sammy Hagar Party Pants
- Three Stooges Incest Theories
What to Talk About on Date Night
Current Favorites
Talking about favorites is an easy, fun, and neutral way to start any
conversation. Favorites can also change regularly, so they're easy to cycle
through (especially things like current favorite song).
1. color
2. song
3. restaurant
4. book
5. hobbie
6. exercise
7. movie / tv show
8. app
9. youtube video
10. indulgence
This or That
Beyond favorites, there's something about knowing if a person prefers
a mac or a pc (for example) that can be so telling about personality and how
they tick. These are similar to favorites and can be expounded on, but are
great for rapid-fire, too.
11. sunrise or sunset
12. beach or mountains
13. camping or cruise
14. mac or pc
15. hot or cold
16. read or write
17. watch or play
18. outdoors or indoors
19. glasses or contacts
20. filthy rich or dirt poor
Would You Rather...
I have a friend that's great at asking "would you rather"
questions. I'm not so much. But it can be fun to put creativity into coming up
with different scenarios to choose from. What follows are some ideas, but
certainly not as creative as this could go!
21. ... have the power of invisibility or telepathy?
22. ... live where the sun always shined or where it never did?
23. ... eat a cooked frog or live bugs?
24. ... have a great personality and be unattractive or have a
terrible personality and be very attractive?
25. ... have no electricity or no water?
26. ... never have to clean the kitchen again, or never have to clean
the bathroom again?
27. ... be deaf or blind?
28. ... trip and fall in front of 10 people you don't know, or say
something embarrassing in front of 1 celebrity?
29. ... capture memories only in videos or only in photos?
30. ... not be able to read or not be able to count?
What would you do if...?
Start with a question and let them expound with the answer. There are
endless possibilities to complete the scenario, but you're just getting the
conversation going.
31. If you could start any non-profit or service project, what would
it be?
32. How would you spend P1,000 extra cash?
33. What would you do if you had to live on a mountain without
warning?
34. If you wrote a book, what would it be about?
35. If you became famous, how would you live your life differently?
36. If you could open any business downtown, what would it be?
37. Where would you go/live if you could travel/live anywhere?
38. What would you do if you won a major lottery?
39. If you could have the perfect marriage, what would it look like?
40. What would your ultimate retirement look like?
Movie/TV-Inspired
Some great conversations have resulted from watching a movie, then
talking about how we would deal in those situations. Movies are an easy and fun
way to dive into topics that we might not otherwise address (or ever face).
41. If your appearance was altered beyond recognition, how would you
prove your identity to me?
42. If you were famous for something, what would you want that to be?
43. What movie/tv show best portrays the story of your life? Is it a
comedy, drama, action, etc.?
44. What would you do if there was a world-wide power outage?
45. What would you do if someone stole your identity and you couldn't
get it back?
46. What would you do if a couple close to you passed away and you
were left to raise their child(ren)?
47. If you had to restart your life (relationships, education, etc.),
where would you start?
48. What would your life be like if you said yes to everything?
49. If you were to be on a reality TV show, which one would you be on?
50. What is your favorite super hero? Which one would you want to be?
Hopes and Dreams
These should be talked about frequently. It gives us the opportunity
to state our passions so we can pursue them, and helps us know our significant
other's passions and find ways to support and encourage them in those. It's
also good to align our goals with each other's and with God's direction.
51. If you could be paid to do anything, what would you do?
52. What would you most regret not having/doing/being in life?
53. If you had to teach something, what would you teach?
54. If money did not exist, how would you spend your days?
55. Best case scenario, where do you see yourself in 5-10 years?
56. What is your ideal home/car/career/family?
57. What are three goals you have had for over a year?
58. What is a habit you could start today that would help you reach
your goals?
59. How would your life be better if you could reach your top two
goals?
60. If you obtained/accomplished one major thing throughout your life,
what would it be?
Memories
Talking about past memories is definitely bonding--seeing how past
events have influenced them into the people they are today. However, when put
on the spot, some of us aren't great at coming up with random memories, so it
helps to have some questions to bring those past experiences to mind.
61. What was your favorite outfit as a kid?
62. Who was your best friend, and what was he/she like?
63. What were some of your favorite things ten years ago?
64. When you were a kid, what did you want to be when you grew up?
65. What was one of your most embarrassing moments?
66. What was one of your proudest moments?
67. Is there a scent that brings back a past memory? What is it?
68. Who was your favorite teacher?
69. When/what was your earliest memory?
70. What was your favorite family holiday?
Worst Case Scenario
These questions can be kind of a downer, so should be used sparingly
and with caution. However, I wanted to include them, because talking about the
tough stuff builds intimacy and can be beneficial in preparing for the
unexpected.
71. If you knew you had 30 days to live, how would you spend that time?
72. If today was your last day on Earth, what would you do?
73. What would you do if you got cancer?
74. What would you do if a fire destroyed your house?
75. What would you do if a tornado came toward you while you were
driving?
76. What would you do if someone broke into your home while you were
there?
77. What would we want to happen to our kids if we both died in a car
accident?
78. What would you do (with job, home, kids, etc.) if I died?
79. If, after an accident, you were kept alive by machines, would you
want me to sign a DNR?
80. What would we do if we lost our jobs tomorrow?
Spiritual
Sometimes spiritual questions seem like they're meant to be left to
Bible studies, but they easily have place in our daily conversations. They can
be a good checkpoint for our personal faith walk, or for our faith walk as a
couple/family.
81. What is your favorite/most-read book of the Bible?
82. What are times you felt closest to/furthest from God?
83. When do you remember first having a personal relationship with
Christ?
84. What hymn or Christian song means the most to you?
85. Was there a spiritual mentor you looked up to when you were
younger?
86. What is one thing likely getting in the way of your full potential
in Christ?
87. How could we grow closer to Christ as a family?
88. Is there a major challenge we should be praying about as a family?
89. What is one thing you have learned about God this year?
90. When was the last time you saw a direct answer to prayer?
State of Being
Finally, sometimes it's just good to find out how the other person is
doing. The usual "how was your day" often results in a simple
"fine" or "okay." These questions can help expound and get
deeper into the other person's daily life.
91. What is your daily routine like? (i.e., what is the first thing
you do when you get to work?)
92. What are your favorite/least favorite parts of your day?
93. What is your most used app?
94. What is your most frequented Web site?
95. How do you prefer to take a break at the end of the day?
96. What makes you feel great about yourself?
97. When do you feel most at peace?
98. What person/place/thing inspires you the most?
99. What makes you excited?
100. What one thing could you do today that would make tomorrow
better?
Some of those date questions are great; very thought provoking and perfect
questions for you to learn important things about someone that would factor in
to your decision on basic compatibility. My only concern though - and this
isn't a criticism, more something I'm genuinely wondering - is that it seems
like it would be difficult to work those questions in to an organically flowing
conversation. As great as those questions are, how would you ask them without
looking like you were reading off some date questionnaire or interviewing them?