I try and comprehend
you but I got a dyslexic heart
I ain't dying to
offend you, I got a dyslexic heart
Are you a mabilisan type of person or chill lang when it comes to
flirting? Haha. I have this friend, whose sooo aggressive - the upshot? nganga!
(Don't worry; I will not mention your name here) Sa kanya lang kasi ako
naguluhan; saan ka naman kasi nakakita ng na-trauma sa long-term relationship
at gusto muna ng chill - taking things slow tapos kung maka-kerengkeng all
out!! Anyare? Wala! Girls creeped out! - maling mali!
You’re busted! Like in a poker game... wala na! Tayo na at umalis sa
poker game, unless you wanna rebuy?!
I admit, mahirap ang di tumanggi sa invitations (lalong lalo na kapag
bet mo yung person) pero mas mahirap tumanggi "in a nice way." So
when you texted her like "Would you like to go out with me?” Madali lang sumagot ng bitchy like "you know what, no! I rather eat alone"
and this; "I'm not sure..." (BOOM! )- kapag nabasa mo yan sa una
palang
Note to self: If she turns you down a few times
(however politely), eto gawin mo:
1.
Turn off your phone
2. Take
off your sim
3. Tapon
mo na yung sim card mo o kaya ilublob mo sa bath tub yang phone mo.
4.
Move on
Yeah, I am a regular reader of
“The Art Of Manliness” at di ko rin
alam kung bakit, ang interesting topics kasi ng mga guys unlike sa girls (i.e. celebrity
crush, makeup brand, #ootd, their exes) sooo dull! Well anyway, i found this topic interesting din kasi at ang bongga ng mga comments ng guys. Ayun.
How to spot a friendzoner?
When we say, "Mars, mare, dear, friend, teh, dude, bro, hey
you!" Run for your life! We only see you as our sister/brother and not
like Angelina Jolie or Channing Tatum type of person, in short, “yummy!"
You get drinks with her at
happy hour!
So, girls love to parteeeey!! There is a proper time to get drinks
with a friend and a proper time to get drinks with someone you’re trying to
sleep with. Should you find yourself constantly going to happy hour with a particular
girl — then you have landed yourself in the friend zone.
It is unusual that she is going to give it up to you after happy hour
because she’s probably just priming herself for dinner with another dude that
she keeps mentioning to you.
We're excited to have you meet
our friends and introduces you as “ our friend”
“This is my friend, (insert your
name here)”… is something that you don't want to hear. This, for sure,
means that you are in the friend zone and all your chances to court your mate
are flushed down the drain. She has obviously told her friends about you, but
not in the way that you were thinking — so just accept the fact that you have
been friend zoned.
So, when you hear our friends' says, "Owws?" "Weeh?" "Yung totoo?" And our
consistent answer is "She's/He's
just a friend.”... Isang bucket pa nga dito!!!
How to spot a friendzonee?
- She/He touches you
or leans in close
- She/He makes it a
point to smell your cologne
- She/He takes you
along with her to another bar/dance club
- She/He
initiates conversation with you
- She/He asks for
your number (but only if she asks before or after giving hers. If she
refuses to give you her number, she’s not interested.)
- She/He looks you
over (especially glances at your mouth)
This next list is more difficult, since you will have to refine
your radar as to what her body language is saying.
It’s much more subtle, and harder to read. Again, I always suggest
that you make sure to judge her/his body language only when you have no other
evidence to help you out.
Here are some buying
indicators:
- Occasional
glance(s) from far away
- Looks at you a few
times (flickering glances at your lips)
- Holds your gaze for
a moment with no words
- Looks down, then
away
- Goes out of her way
to laugh with you
- Posture changes,
looks alert
- Covers her mouth or
touches her face
- Adjusts hair,
attire
- Faces you
- Alert, energetic
- Pupils are dilated
- Open posture (arms
uncrossed)
So, how to avoid an epic fail
da moves?
Get the thought out of your head that "Nice guys finish last," "Girls only like assholes,"
etc.
First, don't agree to everything!
Yeah you like her, pero di naman ibig
sabihin lahat ng gusto nya agree ka naman! Let's say you hate Twilight (because
the movie was an atrocious pile of cow shit), and she claims to say Author of the book makes only amazing books and this is her favourite.
Another example:
Agreeing with us
Us:
Omg I love Justin Timberlake! He's the cutest thing ever!
You:
I know right and I love his new album!
Us:
Omggg you’re officially my best friend!!!
Challenging our opinion
Us:
Omg I love Justin Timberlake! He's the cutest thing ever
You:
Umm what the hell? He's okay, but his music sounds really gay and overrated.
Us:
Lmfao trueee. Soo what kind of music are you into then?
See the difference?
Fucking disagree right there! Don't say
she's a total idiot with no taste, but in chorus, don't tell her you like it. Just
be hilarious about how you think that movie is awful.
Take
action.
If you see the signs (just trust your
instincts...if she's laughing, touching you, smiling, asking about you, etc.,
she probably likes you), then fucking go for it at some point. If she turns you
down, it may be a bit awkward, but if she was truly your friend before, she'll
still be. It's awkward if she thinks you’re her best friend for years and THEN
do that. Don't let it get to that point. That feeling sucks.
DON'T BE OVERLY NICE TO US!
So to recap…
1) Make it clear to the girl /guy from the second you meet that you
want to be more than friends
2) Avoid lending your ear to listen to her/his personal bullshit!
3) Do not be overly nice to her/his and especially do not agree with
everything she/he says.
4) Make yourself mysterious/intriguing.
5) (I forgot to mention this!) DON'T MAKE YOURSELF HER/HIS BITCH! DO
NOT CONSTANTLY DO FAVORS FOR HER/HIM; THIS IS THE WORST THING YOU CAN DO!
Sure, many of you guys out there are douchebags (no offense, I’m one
of them actually haha), but at least they aren't scared to go for it or say
what's on their mind. They're willing to take risks.
And you know what? Sometimes that's all it takes!